So, that being said, I DO believe in praying and the importance of prayer (just not it's all-encompassing power). And we were always so grateful to hear that people were praying for Jack while he was in the NICU. I prayed for him often...hard...all the time. But I tried a different type of prayer (and still do). Instead of praying for God to do something for Jack (heal his lungs, send him home), my prayers were always that of thanks for what he already done for him or us. "Thank you, God, for helping Jack breathe today without needing a ventilator." "Thank you, God, for allowing Jack to tolerate his feeds today." I'm pretty sure that I didn't want to pray for or ask for the wrong thing. (Okay, maybe I believe in the power!). Either way, this type of prayer helped me stay focused on what was happening, rather than what I wanted to happen. I think Jack was praying the same kinds of prayers too.
Which brings me to today. I've been praying the same kind of prayers for baby sister. "Thank you, God, for allowing her to grow these past 24 weeks." (Just had an ultrasound and baby girl is in the 42nd percentile, measuring at 1lb 6oz. Right on target. Not too big, which my gestational diabetes could cause. Not too small, which possible preeclampsia and IUGR could cause. I had both with Jack.) Before the ultrasound, I had just attended Jack's first preschool "Harvest Party." It's funny how different kids act when their parents are around (my Jack included). I'll just leave it at that! But, then, I got this surprise e-mail from Jack's teacher.
"I totally forgot to tell you about something Jack has been doing in class. It is ADORABLE! Every time we say a prayer, I ask them to fold their hands. When I do this, he immediately comes over to me and says "fold hands" and puts his hands out toward me. I put my hands over top of his and we fold them together to say prayers. He knows all the words to the prayers! It melts my heart when he does this! Enjoy your weekend!"
And I have no words. Just tears.
"Thank you, God, for putting this sweet, sweet boy in my life!"